The Many Uses of Duct Tape

I am in no way an expert on the use of duct tape or parenting, but this blog is about a little of both. I was told to write this blog. Not by God, He keeps up with my thoughts the normal way (via Facebook) but by a friend who said that she wanted to be able to see in a more linear and outlined way the random sagacity that streams through my mind, particularly on parenting for some reason...

The Baptism!

The kid got dunked today! I was led to believe this would result in his being much more mild tempered, angelic even, with no more screaming cries or diapers that contain an explosion of evil or loud burps in church. I was lied to on all counts. Granted I was the one who came up with those ideas and was telling myself this, but you think I could trust myself! I'm such a liar. The kid did all three in the course of his Baptism. Here's a play by play, with some explanation for the nonodox out there.

The Promised Update

Well here's the post I promised you here, but without the promised content. See, we ended up not going on the Youth Retreat because of, to borrow a phrase, a series of unfortunate events and the fact that we had a ton of stuff to do. Stuff I'm going to tell you about now! Starting with last Sunday's dinner, because it was beautiful and needed to be shared.

Fresh Baklava

Yes, our little chubbers will be getting dunked tomorrow. That's what the baklava is for. Well not for the actual baptism, Orthodox do not actually baptize using olive oil and honey (I was surprised too) but for the min-reception thingy tomorrow after. The baklava is Lenten, the cake will not be.

Family Resemblances

Apparently we're running a cloning factory...

Friday, May 31, 2013

I'm Going to Start a Training Program...

When your child reaches the wonderfully fun stage where they scream bloody murder unless you're standing, but you have a bad back and can only stand for a few minutes, it turns out you can sometimes fool them by positioning yourself at the edge of the couch and repeatedly pretending you're just on the verge of standing up. True, to the uninformed observer you look as if you're sitting on the edge of your seat, rocking back and forth, with a child clutched to your chest in the manner of one who's going to break down any second because of the stress of parenting, but once you get in a groove you won't even care because the spawn is, mercifully, silent for a few more minutes.

Good luck, rockateers.

Thursday, May 30, 2013

Yes I'm Still Alive

And, as I'm sure you're all more interested in, so is the kid.


Sorry for the sporadic updates, but you almost have to cut me some slack; I've got a two month old kid. On top of that since the last update we've had Holy Week, Pascha, Finals, our first year anniversary, and the past week I've been sickish.


Like you read this blog to hear about my woes. Yeah, yeah, here's the news about our giganto-tron.



(Giganto-tron is a registered trademark of the W______r Family, Inc. All Rights Reserved)



No, seriously, he's officially huge. The doctor said so. At his two month checkup he weighed 17lbs, and his doctor sprained his back lifting him onto the examination table.



He got his first shots too. The doctor said that he's functioning at a 4 month level socially and physically. To get all serious for a mo', I don't care much about the physical part. The kid is huge-of course his muscles are all uber developed. I'm slightly concerned he's going to expect me to teach him how to throw a football someday or some such nonsense and I'm going to have to call up Ben, or if he wants to kick a football, I'm going to have to call up his Uncle David, and make him come teach him, after I grill David on why he's infecting my son with his inability to say "soccer."








But the social development, that was a huge relief. They had worried that his brain might have been effected by oxygen deprivation when he didn't breath at birth (that whole, week-in-the-hospital thing after he was born). Apparently not only is he meeting his mental milestones, but he's exceeding them. It was very nice to hear that he seems to be completely normal, from a medical professional.

So here are a few more gratuitous pictures of the face you came to see. Promise to try to update more often. Summer vacation has started, so all I have to worry about is keeping the house clean, and occasionally holding the kid, and changing a few diapers, and I'm making a summer project of Latin and French, and dealing with the uprising of emotions brought on by the 7 Seasons of Boy Meets World we got for our Anniversary. 



 


Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Torture

...is finally seeing the kid you've been trying to coax, bribe, jiggle, and rock to sleep for thirty minutes responding to the aforementioned actions with (at last!) drooping eyelids, only to have your nose erupt in a fury of itchiness. Both hands fully of baby.

I'll post pictures of Pascha later, right now I'm not disturbing the sleeping siren who slumbers on my chest.