Dying Eggs for Pascha

If there's one thing Orthodox take seriously, it's dying eggs.

Well, Christ, but the eggs come a close second. Maybe after the Theotokos. And the Saints. and Liturgy. And Baklava.

But eggs, man, they're up there.

Most people are used to a variety of pastel colored eggs for Easter. For Orthodox Pascha there's just one color (usually). Red. A deep, crimson red. It's dark for a reason - it represents the blood of Christ. The dye we make can look like a bowl full of blood. It's a sad reminder of the tortures Christ endured and His ability to meet us at our own level, no matter how shattered we are. However, inside is a golden treasure, and chicks burst from inside what, really, looks like it could be a rock, just as Christ turns all things into New Life.

Dying eggs is a very old Christian tradition, and no, we probably didn't get it from the pagans. The dying of eggs directly matches the spread of Christianity. Some say we get the tradition from St. Mary Magdalene giving an egg to the Emperor Tiberius as she told him of Christ's resurrection. He said it was as likely as the egg turning red, and the egg then did so. That's why St. Mary Magdalene is shown with an egg in many of her icons:

Some, as in this article which shows that there was never any goddess named Ostara, and that bunnies and eggs are Christian symbols (though Orthodox don't really do anything with a bunny) say the eggs come from old Jewish traditions about eggs and funerals and Passover.

So, if you want to get an egg as deep a red as the one in that icon, what do you do? Naturally, God's own creations are better dyes than anything from PAAS.

You start by collecting yellow onion skins. Many people think that red should be used, but no, it's yellow. The large yellow onions have a nice red tinge to them. We collect onion skins all of Great Lent. We're also doing some blue this year because, apparently, blue is the traditional color for the eggs that go in the German Easter Bread we make, so for that you need red cabbage.

You also need some pots, white vinegar and, of course, eggs. This is pointless without eggs.

Shred the cabbage and put into a pot, and put the onion leaves in a larger pot. We had about 15 onion skins from our own onions, and we do a run to the grocery store just before egg-dying and raid their onion bins for loose skins. Stick a few onions in there (everyone needs onions anyway) and buy the bag. People don't even tend to look at me weird. Well, not because of the onion skins anyway.

Cover the cabbage and the skins with water, add 2 tablespoons of vinegar, and let them come to a boil.

Your home will be quite humid. Some people go to spas and pay money for "Vegetable Steam Baths." Probably. I don't know.

The cabbage boiled for about thirty minutes. The skins closer to an hour. Check the color of the water and just stop boiling when you reach a dye color that is a little darker than what you want the egg to be. We stopped at these colors:

Yes it looks purple. Stick with me here.

I know, orange. I promise, we'll get through this.

The eggs somehow interact with the dye and create the blue and red we want. So now we let the dyes cool (large bowls under a dining room fan and stirring help). Then put the dyes back in the pots and add the eggs. We do more red eggs than blue. Let them boil for about ten minutes to cook the eggs, then pull them off the stove and let the dyes cool again (with or without the eggs. Your eggs might get overcooked if you keep them in the dye though).

Here's what our eggs looked like after cooking:

Not very impressive, amirite? Especially that blue. WEAK! 

Final step. Once the dyes have cooled, put the eggs back in and put the bowls in the fridge. Let them sit over night. Some people skip this step and then complain that their eggs were orange or brown, and I wouldn't call that 'blue' up there. But here's what happens if you let them sit:

Big difference, no?

Now these eggs are still wet, but that's ok. To get that shiny look you just rub them with olive oil and a very soft cloth after they dry. Our eggs are currently drying.

So after all that, what do you do with a red egg? You hold it up to someone after midnight this weekend and say "Christ is risen!" The other individual will respond "He is risen indeed!" and you crack your eggs together. The one who comes away with an intact egg is the winner and goes on to challenge others. The 'loser' gets to eat an egg. Really, no losers.

But please, take them out of the shell before eating.

Some people just gotta do their own thing, I suppose.